shattered-porcelain

I totally suck at making this page work. Maybe I should shoot me, or threaten to if I don't post stuff more than in sporadic attempts. I can't make me consistent in my postings. Maybe you guys need to shoot me instead. Blargh.

I'm leaving my job. Hurray? It's sucking. I called my boss a bitch today at work. Not a good move.
Don't be me.

- Talitha

So I finally got my butt into gear and posted stuff from Christmas and New Years. Hurrah. Five new submissions and you people better be happy about it. And the photos I got from my sisters tenth birthday party turned out really bad. And no amount of trying to alter them to make them look good will work. So pixie wing make-up is totally out for the count. I really needed proper face paints... which I totally didn't have.

But anyways, life for me is good. God is great and totally awesome. Spent two weekends devoting my time to learning more about him and growing in my spiritual walk, or flight, with Him. I am a butterfly! And I even have a Christian boyfriend now, who wants God first in his life. So is all good with me.

Really, life is good. God is everything. I'm actually happy for the first time in ages. Finding Him again has turned my world upside down and I'm realising things I should have a long time ago. It's great.

There is also lots and lots of wub for my awesome Ishi. Who is my pretty model for my Ashe-Leigh series. Spent one of my weekends away with her, Cass (Ishe's younger sister) and our friend Jordan. Was great. God time with just girls. We are all beautiful butterflies and totally Gods. He made us just how He wanted us to be, and that is perfect in His sight.

Really, never been happier than I am now. And sorry to any who read this and are sketchy on the God stuff... But He is my all and my creator.

Yeah, yeah. I know. I have nothing. Actually, I have some photos I want to put up, but computer at home which stores said photos hates me and crashes every time I try to access them. Eeeevil computer.
And I did put up a poem. Finally something that wasn't inspired by at the time traumatic events. Or depression... but I haven't put those poems up. So it doesn't matter! I actually thought of 'Whisper' while I was at work. I was folding foils, go figure. It's really philosophically inspiring work. Honest.

And my baby sister turns ten on the weekend. So, for her enjoyment and my embarresment, I am dressing up as a purple pixie. She's having a "magical" themed party. But, I have managed to con my other two sisters into being pixies with me also. I have a purple fringe, so I am a purple pixie; my older sister has multi-shaded blue hair, so she is a blue pixie; and our younger sister is blonde. So she's gonna be a yellow pixie with black detail, kinda like a monarch butterfly, but yellow instead of orange. Hopefully I will be able to get decent photos of the three of us with our pretty, pretty make-up and wings. And then I shall post them here, coz we shall be walking, talking, breathing artworks. Yay...

And computers will someday rule the world and wreak havoc and destruction far worse than the frustration they cause today. Eeeeeviiiil.

It's Christmas tomorrow? Gah! Yep, ok. Over that now.

On to the reason why I'm awake. At 2 in the morning no less. I was absolutely knackered when I got home from work. I ate half a pizza, gave my Aunt her Christmas present and promptly crashed out on my bed. It wouldn't even have been 8pm. And then... I just woke up. And it was very early morning. Luckily, I have nocturnal friends who are on the net at odd times. Well... one nocturnal friend anyways.


Sometimes, I hate my mind. Sometimes I want to not think about things. Sometimes I don't want thoughts to penetrate my sleep. Worry, worry, worry and I wake up feeling exhausted. Thinking, thinking, thinking thoughts that do not need to be thought. Friends, friends, confused. Not friends? More than friends? No just friends. Always just friends. Never more, always less. Do I want it to be more? No. Keep friends, is safer, less confusing. Confuse me. One word from one person. React? I don't know how. Turmoil. Why? I don't know. I'm not even making sense to myself.

So... first journal entry. Interesting.

It's starting to sink in about now that Christmas is a week away. Scary scary thought. I started thinking about what I need to do before Christmas, and realised I have almost literally two days to do it in. Luckily most of my presents have been bought, so all I need to do is wrap them on the weekend. But I'm painting some frangapanis for my Aunt, who is coincedently my God-mother aswell. I have Monday to do it in. Too much work...

The problem with having a full-time job is, that you have money. And therefore feel guitly if you don't buy Christmas and birthday presents for your immediate family. Small children were easy, $10 computer games.


I think my last week of classes at BACA is next week. I don't know what I'm going to do about strengthening and keeping the callouses on my hands from trapeze over the weeks off though. Mum reckons I should do weights, but you use different muscles to the ones you use for climbing. I will really miss doing silks and trapeze as my aerials though. It's been so much fun, despite the bruises and friction burns from the silks.

Everything is finishing up for the year. It's almost sad... But friends are coming up from Victoria for New Years eve so, the entry into the New Year should be fun.
And I have no inspiration for drawings and need to get a decent camera to take photos of people other than myself... aim for the New Year - Actually put effort in for my DA stuff.

Auf Weidersehen people!